What is the Addicted Cop Thinking?

By Sean Riley

A dear friend of mine always says and he’s right, “We treat our cars better than we treat our first responders in addiction who are going to die”.   When the red light comes on in our vehicles we immediately take the vehicle into the mechanic and have it assessed, evaluated and fixed. When we’re dealing with the alcoholic or addicted first responder, the red lights come on and as a profession we will enable them to protect our partners (blind loyalty), try to fix the problems ourselves (which only a professional can do) or cast them aside and throw them away as if it is someone else’s problem (the easy way out).

Continue reading “What is the Addicted Cop Thinking?”

I Wanted the Pain to End… My Journey to Healing Begins

By Mark Honzel

I was a police officer in a medium-sized, violent, Midwestern city.  After 19 years in patrol working various positions as a housing authority officer, a FTO, a K9 handler, and patrol officer I was beginning to have some problems.  I was not sleeping, I was having nightmares, I was hypervigilant, I was anxious, and I was drinking too much – to “help” me sleep and to “help” with the nightmares.  I was worried about how I was going to handle the next dead kid; I had recently performed CPR on a child and an infant who both died.  I had started seeing the police chaplain and then a counselor.  I had depression, anxiety, and PTSD from all of the murders, suicides, vehicle deaths, and violent encounters I had been involved in.

Continue reading “I Wanted the Pain to End… My Journey to Healing Begins”