Trauma… When It Comes Knocking At Your Door

 

Steven Smith – Retired Assistant Chief Of Police

As a 1st responder we experience the worst of humanity, see people at their worst and lowest times. We tend to protect ourselves from all of this by just stowing it away, not dealing with it, filing it away. Well I did that and after I retired those experiences came knocking. Sometimes they came all at once, other times one at a time. I’m not sure which way was worse being overwhelmed by the horde of experiences or remembering every detail from them as they came in one by one.

I’m going to tell you about the ones that have come back to me recently to deal with. Not sure why but these are all focused on car wrecks. For whatever reason these are the ones that are requiring me to process and deal with now what I didn’t then. Some of these are the from almost 20 years ago and I’m also doing my best to protect the families that were involved, as I’m sure their pain is still as bad today as it was when they endured these tragedies. So here it goes, please excuse my typos as these are not easy to talk about.

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The #Trauma of the Small Town First Responder…

By Safe Call Now Admin Staff

It is no secret that it is hard to be a first responder. What surprises me is the small town mindset that small town first responders shouldn’t have the same trauma as first responders in a large city. Hear me when I say “trauma is trauma.”

Just for the sake of those who don’t understand, let’s discuss small town trauma for a moment. We live in a seemingly safe small town. Our county has about 25,000 and the city is very much “everyone knows everyone.” We rarely make the news.

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A Letter To The Man I Killed… by a Cop

By Kirk Lawless

Some people know this about me; others do not. I have killed a man. This is not a confession; it is just fact. I have nothing to hide about it. I am not ashamed of the fact. I have no regrets about doing it. I was doing my job. At the time of your death, I was a police officer. And, you tried your best to kill me. I am the police officer that killed you.

I hope you were not long in your suffering, but as I am aware, during the short time I spent with you, listening to your cries of agony and for mercy, the curses you spat at me, I endured, as you bled to death. I endured.

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